I just came home from a stupid day of cabinet istallation/electrical work to find a large box from Lee Valley precariously placed on the corner of the workbench! After unpacking the box and removing one sueperb large low angle jack plane I rushed into the living room to show it to the wife, actually putting it right in front of her face in forced appreciation (yeah, I missed her today). And she said: “Hey, isn’t that your new sander?” Wow. This is about as far away from a sander as you can get in my mind, but that’s cool. In fact some might say they are polar opposites . . .
In my defense maybe I’ve been talking about sanding too much (hence the plane purchase). In her defense, the light was low. Maybe you had to be there, but it seemed pretty funny at the time.
Brian
Edited 1/10/2009 9:23 am ET by BrianDerr
Replies
Brian,
I trade "interest" with the ladywife. She evinces a degree of interest in my woodworking and its various issues, problems, triumphs, disaster; I do the same concerning her gardening and allotment veggie-growing.
Now, neither of us is interested in the other's main hobby to the point of actually doing it. Nevertheless, once this "trading of interests" takes place, it's surprising how a real and actual interest develops. Colleen is genuinely interested in my furniture designs and tool-use minutiae and I have grown not only interested but reasonably knowledgeable about fruit tree propagation, nematode control of slugs and a whole range of other topics.
Lataxe, who knows good marriages require attention, practice and lots of groking (besides certain other essential procedures).
Go ahead and help her along with the "basic Knowledge" of what you do, but don't let her in on all the details and don't have her working in your business if you are self employed. When women know too much about things like this, they tend to worry excessively. And always remember that there is such a thing as too much togetherness, at least it's that way at my house. But I've been married to the same woman for only 42 years, so maybe someone with more experience can weigh in. Bill
BB,
Only one woman in 42 years and yet you are using this single example to define the general characteristics of all wimminfolk!? Hmmm, that is a very small sample from which to derive a theory. :-)
Lataxe, who likes a lot of togetherness; and also women who know a lot as it helps them stop worrying about what we idiot blokes are up to now.
Lataxe, I'm sure you're right. I never have known much about women, and am probably now too old to learn. I hope the OP will take your advice and not mine. (:
My girlfriend has taken to my lathe and is making pens. We stopped at LeeValley today and she picked up a Pen Vise and a few kits she had pre-ordered and I got my order. In the stuff I bought today there was a book on making Love Spoons. She looked through it and said she was going to make one. Not going to be my shop for much longer!
Yesterday she ordered the new Veritas Nickel Premium Block Plane for my birthday next week. Today on the way home she asked if I was going to use it, or put it on the coffee table to show off and look at! :) It is going to be a user......after it sits on the table for a little bit. ;)
It's an almost surreal feeling not having to sneak in tools or justify another one like my buddy does and once I've explained what a tool does I never need to do it again. She is catching on real quick!
Someday I envision the shop having "his and her" stuff in it. Two benches, with tool cabinets stocked with the tools that suit our individual interests, and wood racks stocked with our stashes of hoarded wood. A bit like a master bath with two sinks, only way better.
I've got it good, don't anybody wake me up!;)
The reason you think you have it good is she is still your girlfreind, every one needs rheir own space,so wake up ,sorry I do not mean to be rude because I too love to have the wife around to help out once in a while.
"The reason you think you have it good is she is still your girlfreind, every one needs rheir own space,so wake up ,sorry I do not mean to be rude because I too love to have the wife around to help out once in a while."The best relationship advice ever given on knots.My wife took a woodworking course a few years back at Lee Valley. She saw the project and said 'I'd like to build that.' It was a woodworking for women class, half the particpants there said they were there so they could spend more time with their husbands. All my wife said is "I'm sure that what all the husbands want!"I love my wife, I love spending time with her, and I love spending time with my boys (18 month old twins), but Sunday afternoon is Buster time...
Sorry boys, I'm determined to not wake up. She is living with me and we get along great. I spend a lot more time with the people I work for and with, and can't stand most of them. They are the ones I need to get away from to keep my sanity, not her! (Not being defensive by the way.) You're just envious because I got a good one. So there!Besides you are all overlooking the fact that when any conversation comes up that could end up with a dreaded "honey do" list item in it. I can just look at her and say in an encouraging tone, "You're really talented and know how to do that, so go and enjoy yourself!" There is a method to my madness after all. I won't even need to sharpen the kitchen knives.;-) You'll never hear me gripe about my lady taking my Japanese chisels and opening paint cans or chopping roots in the garden with them either.Sitting happily in my bubble. :-)
Clearly you need therapy... :) Just kidding.
That's really exciting. Maybe you could teach her how to play poker. Or maybe go fishing. (smiley face inserted here)
Seriously, are you at all concerned about her knowing that you actually don't need that new tool like a Marcou S15A. Even worse, what if she finds out that you even had the audacity to upgrade the knob.
Matt, who needs his wife to bait his hook
No representation without taxation
Edited 1/13/2009 11:59 am ET by MattInPA
"Seriously, are you at all concerned about her knowing that you actually don't need that new tool like a Marcou S15A. Even worse, what if she finds out that you even had the audacity to upgrade the knob."Not really since I had never even hinted that I would ever want the shinny new Veritas block plane she's getting for my birthday since I have a Record.A couple days ago I told her Holtey planes go for around $7,000. She gasped slightly and then I told her a Marcou was only about a third as much. Much closer to a bargain you see. (Got to plant the seeds in the mind early.) She did say if her Lottery ticket wins big, she will buy me a set of Hotleys......after the long trip to the tropics. :-)My Bubble is still intact and your welcome to keep trying to burst it.
"A couple days ago I told her Holtey planes go for around $7,000. She gasped slightly and then I told her a Marcou was only about a third as much. Much closer to a bargain you see. (Got to plant the seeds in the mind early.)"
ATTABOY, go for it, that's the ticket! You must take a medal now and I will nominate you for a discount!Philip Marcou
When the seeds have grown, matured and are ready to harvest, I'll let her know that there may be a discount to get the crop in a little sooner. A small courtesy extended to members of the Commonwealth. Shall we say....our colourful Canadian dollar at par with those drab American ones you would normally have for your fine expressions of the plane makers art? ;-)
"you actually don't need that new tool like a Marcou S15A. Even worse, what if she finds out that you even had the audacity to upgrade the knob"
Er, Mat, can you elaborate on the knob part? (;)Philip Marcou
please don't quote half of a sentence. half of any sentence doesn't make sense.
The entire sentence was a joke that may have been better stated like this "Seriously, are you at all concerned about her knowing that you actually don't need that new tool. Even worse, what if she finds out that you even had the audacity to upgrade that tool that you may or may not actually need."
I thought the joke was funnier when I took it to an extreme and cited your excellent craftsmanship.
Is that enough elaboration?
No representation without taxation
Edited 1/14/2009 8:16 am ET by MattInPA
Matt,
I was actually directing the question at the "knob" part of your sentence . Sorry to mis-lead you: I did take the reference to a plane as a joke.Philip Marcou
That is great. The unfortunate side of this scenario is that now you will have to take up another expensive hobby for when you need to get away. : )
I fail to see this as a good thing. My shop is my sanctuary and the secret to a successful marriage.
I think you misunderstood. I'll translate for you. That meant "I'm happy for you, but get that thing out of my face."
I'm guessing her reaction was no more enthusiastic then yours when she shows you a new knitting needle.
Actually, this incident reminds me what it is like to ask to see a specific tool at Home Depot.
My wife's only purpose in the workshop is for final inspection. When I'm done with a project, she always "inspects" it before I deliver it to the customer.
Jeff
If she judges it too harshly, get your girlfriend to inspect it instead! ;-)
What's more interesting, women or woodworking? It's hard to say . . . my reaction to my wife that inspired the title of this thread was shear amazement at her lack of tool knowledge (exercise and mothering are her fields). My vague notion to improve it doesn't actually mean that I want to spend much time with her in the shop! Conversation and demonstration, if it comes to that, are enough. Lataxe: 'trading interests' sounds like a great policy, at least a great way of describing life with another. Funny how a person can take an interest in almost anything if they want to. This is great up to a point but also means we must work hard to focus, i.e., not sharpen all morning long instead of building something. I'm pointing at me, not you. I do enjoy conversing with my wife about work to the extent that she follows, so i think my attempts at increasing her knowledge are mainly so that I can talk about something in the evenings and feel I am being listened to.Jeff?: Way to go with the token 'inspection'. But what do you do if she says to start over? And how do the female woodworkers feel about letting their husbands in the shop? Brian
My best friend, companion, and lover for 36 years is welcome anytime in my sanctuary -- more commonly referred to as "the shop". Her hobby is ceramics and she has her own cleaning station for greenware work and uses her own personal dust collector drop in "the shop".
She also sometimes migrates to "her" scroll saw.
Now -- here's the other half. I am a one person shop. There are times I need help. Guess who volunteers immediately to help. Right! She is always willing. So when I am not alone, I am still very happy. Besides, if something were to happen and I could no longer count to ten, it is comforting to know someone is close to pick up the "pieces" and provide transport. She is only in "the shop" probably less than 2 hours a week and many times we are just eating lunch. But she is always home and just an intercom call away.
I would not have it any other way! I guess that just my thoughts.
A bad day woodworking is better than a good day working -- yes, I'm retired!
Jeeeeez, when I yell upstairs for some one to come to the shop and hurry, they all scatter! Probably, cause they know blood is involved and also they know I'm primarily hand tools, so the cut is not bad.
T.Z.
The other day I was in my shop with my 4 year old granddaughter making a birdhouse. After a time of her usual talkativeness, she got very quiet, then looked up from her bench and said, "Papaw, sometimes when you're at work, grandma comes into your shop."
Neil
Neil,
Time to buy grandma-traps. What will you demand as the release fee? I can send you a list of suggestions although some are illegal, some a bit cruel and others are quite beyond the pale.
Perhaps you could wait for her to sneak in then lock her in there for a bit? She will become both bored and offended by the mess, thus resulting in your shed getting cleaned and tidied. Let her out in time to make tea and get her makeup on for your evening session.
Lataxe, ducking rapidly behind a wall to avoid getting hit with a high-heeled shoe.
"--sander---" That's pretty funny! My beautiful bride refers to planes as "chippers"! I have no idea where that comes from!!
Best to both of you!
Mack
"Close enough for government work=measured with a micrometer, marked with chalk and cut with an axe"
My wife stays out of the "Boardroom" except to borrow a handtool now and then. I like having that private space. A friend from work has a room(non shop) in his basement he calls the "Manhole". It's a good escape from time to time, though I have a great wife, and don't ever feel the need to run from her. She will help in the boardroom when asked. He best trait is talking me into buying new tools. God I love that lady. I assume she wants me to get new tools (toys) so I'll go downsatirs and play, and stay out of her way.
Funny story, Brian! Roles are reversed in my house, hubby's familiar with most hand tools, but power tools are sometimes a mystery to him. He's developed an appreciative relationship with my planer, after I was able to take inexpensive, rough cedar from a mill down to the exact thickness of the cedar boards on the outside of our house (repairing damaged boards). And he loves the Bosch 12" CMS.
I'm with the others here who see the shop as a santuary. It's an "alone place" for me, and I don't much enjoy working in it when there's someone else around. Perhaps because I talk to myself alot when puttering around, LOL.
When you talk to yourself you're assured of two things; an intelligent speaker and an attentive audience! (at least that's what I always tell myself)
Regards,
Mack"Close enough for government work=measured with a micrometer, marked with chalk and cut with an axe"
h-m-m-m.... I guess my self-talk is a little different, it goes something like this: (when I screw up) "you stupid idiot!, did you forget to turn your brain on?""like you've got one""one of mine for ten of yours""you're stupid""you're an idiot".......and so forth.
Brian STUPID MAN!
Why did you not just hug her and thank her?
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